“Somebody I Used to Know” by Wendy Mitchell

Writer: Brianna Viets

Editors: Prahalad Srinivasan and Vijaya Varadarajan

In 2014, Wendy Mitchell was diagnosed with dementia at the age of 58. This mention of this disease - one that is irreversible and has no cure - automatically insinuates feelings of pure despair and sadness. Thoughts of blank white space, a loss of words, and memories filled with lost pieces that no longer fit a puzzle begin to fill one’s mind. However, Wendy Mitchell aims to change this mindset by opening up to the world about her experiences with dementia. As she puts it, “No one should be ashamed of having dementia - it’s a complex brain disease so why on Earth should we be ashamed?”

Figure 1: A quote by Wendy Mitchell from her book. (Image from Alzheimer’s Society)

It all began with the simple act of forgetfulness, growing into something bigger over time. She started falling without warning, finding herself in frequent accidents, and suddenly having no memory of where she was; these were the red-flag signs that progressed into worse conditions as her days, weeks, and months continued. It was that one moment when she was at work when she looked up and could not recall what she was doing, that she decided to visit the doctor for a diagnosis. Although she already had a strong sensation of what was causing these unfortunate moments, it was sadly confirmed that she had early-onset Alzheimer’s disease.

Wendy Mitchell’s life took a drastic turn when she was given the life-altering diagnosis. Those who were close to her started to drift away when she informed them about the disheartening news - neighbors avoided her by crossing the street while coworkers gently let her go from her job. She would no longer retain those precious memories of her two daughters, whom she hoped to stay connected with for the years to come. Her ability to remember would slowly continue to diminish and there would be no possibility of reversing the symptoms of the disease. A sense of disappointment, defeat, and sorrow grew as the emptiness around her expanded. 

Figure 2: Wendy Mitchell speaking at a convention organized by Research Network (Image from Alzheimer’s Society)

Since then, Wendy Mitchell published her memoir “Somebody I Used to Know” to spread awareness about Alzheimer’s by explaining her personal experiences with it. Although she wakes up every morning and tries to recall who she was before the disease hit her, she has learned to live with the thought. Mitchell refuses to dwell on the negative emotions that seem to be creeping their way closer to her by living every day to the fullest as if it’s her last. Furthermore, she has become an advocate for creating a positive support system for others who have been impacted by Alzheimer’s. 

Wendy Mitchell travels to various parts of the country to act as a motivational speaker who aims to inspire individuals to change their views regarding Alzheimer’s. Rather than describing it as something a person will “suffer” from, she urges people to use the phrase “living with.” Through implementing subtle changes in the language utilized to discuss the disease, Mitchell hopes to encourage diagnosed patients to keep a positive outlook in life. She recommends talking as much as possible to those around them and to cherish every moment they have. Moreover, she hopes that those who have been impacted will continue to stand strong. It’s been a battle that she refuses to lose, and her determination to stay strong during the fight is admirable. 

Citations:

Edemariam, Aida. “Somebody I Used to Know by Wendy Mitchell review – dementia from the inside.” The Guardian, 31 January 2018, https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/jan/31/somebody-i-used-to-know-wendy-mitchell-review. Accessed 16 December 2023.

Gerrard, Nicci, and Barbara Ehrenreich. “Wendy Mitchell on her extraordinary Alzheimer’s memoir | Autobiography and memoir.” The Guardian, 28 January 2018, https://www.theguardian.com/books/2018/jan/28/wendy-mitchell-somebody-i-used-to-know-interview-dementia. Accessed 16 December 2023.

“,.” , - YouTube, 30 October 2023, https://www.bing.com/search?q=wendy+mitchell&cvid=6a29d37dbbf949dc9caa0ee4d128d8d4&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUqBggAEEUYOzIGCAAQRRg7MgYIARAuGEAyBggCEEUYOTIGCAMQRRg7MgYIBBAuGEAyBggFEAAYQDIGCAYQABhAMgYIBxBFGDwyBggIEEUYPNIBCDE1MTRqMGo5qAIAsAIA&FORM=ANAB01&PC=HCTS. Accessed 16 December 2023.

“,.” , - YouTube, 30 October 2023, https://www.alz.org/news/2020/more-women-get-alzheimer-s-than-men-wh. Accessed 16 December 2023.